ESPN's endless hype compels me to make three quick points:
1. Duke and Carolina aren't playing for anything. They're both going to be in the tournament, so they're basically playing for a slightly better geographic placement. Still my beating heart. Even if most fans cared about the college basketball regular season, which they don't because the tournament has killed it, the game still wouldn't be for big stakes because the ACC pretentiously declares the winner of its postseason tournament to be the champion. Thus, the Heels and Devils aren't even playing for a championship. Instead, they're playing for the right to play Maryland instead of Boston College in the first round of the tournament. Texas-Oklahoma this is not. Call me if they meet in the ACC Tournament Final.
2. There are no Duke fans in the State of North Carolina. Or so I've been told by every friend I've ever had from UNC. The jokes about the University of New Jersey at Durham are funny and all, but they do detract from the incessant "they're eight miles apart!" bullshit. Duke is a little oasis of Connecticutians in a sea of Tar Heel and Wolfpack fans. If this isn't a border war and it isn't a civil war, then what the hell is it?
3. The entire country (save for those of us who are luckily in the Raycom footprint) has to watch the game on mute. You can't seriously think that anyone can listen to Dick Vitale perform verbal fellatio on these two admittedly fine programs for more than five minutes without hitting the mute button. And for all the talk about the game's atmosphere, how much of that comes across when confronted with a choice between silence and the brutal rape of one's own ear drums by the man who personifies the term obnoxious yankee?
I watched USA-Mexico tonight, followed by Juno. Piss off, I'm a man and I can do what I want.