Tuesday, June 14, 2005

No, I'm pretty sure that you aren't G-d, Wyatt

File this under "truth is stranger than fiction." There has to be a mad rush on Florida Gator message boards right now to come up with the best one-liner to describe Florida State's starting quarterback proclaiming himself to be "G-d" or the "Son of G-d." Initially, I would say that he's simply trying to get in good with Saint Bowden and his on-going religious war against the government to let Fisher DeBerry rename his team "Christ's Air Force." Upon further examination, the Bonnaroo reference makes it pretty clear that Wyatt got his hands on some truly powerful shrooms and they knocked him into the sort of place The Beatles were in when they wrote "Sargeant Pepper." (By the way, it's clear that Ivan Maisel has no idea what Bonnaroo is, based on his description in the article.) Sexton's performance in the middle of the street isn't quite the menace to society that we've come to expect from Florida State players, but if he really responded to the pressure of being the FSU starter by going insane, then he's certainly not the right guy to lead an alleged top ten team.

And on a related note, Miami becomes a smidge more likely to win the national title now that their trip to Lower Alabama will entail facing either a redshirt freshman or a guy who had a psychotic break 12 weeks before the opener.

1 comment:

Aaron P. said...

Nice catch GGB. Thanks for the heads up.